It was when txt spk started to become cool that I realised there was money and moved into mobile content in 2000 – so I always watch what the kids say – especially when they don’t want us “rents” (parents) to understand what they are up to.

A study conducted by the telecommunications arm of the Post Office (didn’t that used to be British Telecom ?) has searched out the terms that are not yet in wide use but may be soon.

Amongst the usual txt spk are phrases from London Undergrounds Contactless Oyster Card Scheme so here are a few Oyster pearls so you can avoid being 404 when the kids next open their mouths.

The card readers show the number 35 if the card has run out of credit. As a result, “Code 35” has come to mean penniless.

Similarly, if you’re behind the times, you might be “Code 11” – Oyster’s way of signifying an out-of-date card.

Yet more evidence that the time for contactless has come.

I was about to write “l8rs m8s” when my 14 yr old daughter leant over, read what I’d written and said “your trying to dance Dad – not good” – suitably humbled I’ll go and get my hot cocoa and put my slippers on. Now where did I put my glasses?